Tank usage line wins March cartoon caption contest

U.S. Stamp Notes by John M. Hotchner

The March cartoon caption contest featured a World War II tank on a 29¢ stamp (Scott 2559e) in the first pane of 10 stamps in the USPS series commemorating events of World War II. That pane, called “1941: A World at War,” was issued Sept. 3, 1991.

“Tanks a lot” and variations of it were the most popular entries. The first one received was from Joe Kowalski of Waupun, Wis.: “Putin to NATO: ‘Well, tanks a lot’!”

Another popular theme was other places in the world besides Ukraine the tank might be employed. Several readers sent versions of this line from Tom Barylski of Livonia, Mich., “We’re off to Ohio to demand print issues of Linn’s!”

Maybe the most unusual suggestion came from Jesse Hykes of Raymore, Mo.: Missouri: “Ukraine? Nope — we’re headed to New York City to battle their rat problem!”

Surprisingly, there were few Ukraine-related entries beyond the standard “blast the Russian” theme. One that struck me as thoughtful is from John Barrera of Concord, N.C., which takes account of the daily political strife evident in our media: “We’re helping Ukraine out; but who’s helping the U.S.?”

Pull down the tank’s hatch, and it is near impregnable. Fred Zinkann of Montgomery, Ill., wins the philatelic portion of the contest by applying that feature to postal operations, with the line shown in the box on this page.

On the nonphilatelic side of the contest, the winner is Daniel Nacrelli of Elizabeth City, N.C., who suggests, “License and registration please. Do you know why I pulled you over?”

Both winners will receive a 13-week subscription to Linn’s (a new subscription or an extension).

Here are the best of the other runners-up:

“WWII-era stamp cancellation experiment that was not adopted,” by Laura and Tom Tomaszek of Cedar Rapids, Iowa.

“No, Senator, this is not a tank. It’s a machine to perforate those super-big sheets PMG Farley had printed,” from Merlin Dorfman of Livermore, Calif.

“Effective against bunkers and armored vehicles, but balloons? Not so much!” by Kenny Moore of Rocklin, Calif.

“Time to ‘tank up’ on Forever stamps while they’re still less than a dollar,” by Vernon Kleen of Springfield, Ill.

This is the last time I buy from eBay in Russia. I ordered a receptacle for my goldfish, and this is what I got!” by Steve Kotler of San Francisco, Calif.

“I must have done something very wrong to get this RFD route!” from Alan Heacock of Bedford, N.H.

“Did anyone check the oil and windshield washer fluid?” by Richard Wolf of Baltimore, Md.

“No, not hunting Nazis; looking for stamp counterfeiters!” sent by Joseph Bukis of Charlotte Hall, Md.

Thanks and a tip of the hat to all who entered. The next contest will be announced in the May 8 issue of Linn’s.

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